How would a real estate agent describe this property?
"Cozy yet airy, with a wonderful unrestricted view in every direction"
Reminds me of some of my classmates in high school who "borrowed" a realty sign and stuck it up in our teacher's front yard. The next day the teacher had lots of strangers just randomly pulling up and asking if they could look through the house. Being the kindest old gent who ever drew breath, he and his wife gave all who asked a guided tour of their home.
It wasn't until fairly late in the day that he discovered the sign on his lawn.